I lived in Orlando for quite a few years, so this is more of a "shame on me" but I had seen this property from the outside and it looked fine and the price was right, so I booked a room for the weekend (part business, part pleasure). Looks can be deceiving! When I arrived (prior to the 3pm check-in), the desk clerk (who I think was bolted to the desk. In the three days I was there, she had on the exact same clothes every day....weird...) informed me there were no clean rooms. I wish at that point in time that she said "ever", as I would have left right then. She was having a great deal of difficulty in locating the maid. I returned at 5pm, only to be informed (along with some other people with reservations) that there were still no rooms to be had, and the elusive maid was still nowhere to be found.
I finally did get a room, but not the non-smoking room I had reserved. It absolutely reeked of stale smoke. There was a hole in the bathroom door and the carpets were beyond sticky. I did get a nice check-in gift - a 6-pack of Bud Light left from the previous guest, which made me wonder if there truly was a maid in this place. But hey, free beer! It's a good thing I had it too, as the cable connection in the room was awful, and any program could be seen if you squinted through the snow! And along with the beer, I had company - a whole bunch of roaches. I knew I'd be out most of the next day, so I just sucked it up and slept with one eye open, as some of the clientele were a little sketchy (not my roach roomies though!)
The next day I bought an air freshener - not much help. When we drove back in the afternoon to change, we were greeted by the odd combo of vomit and weave hair in the parking lot (I wish I was making this up.)
Needless to say, I will not be making a return visit to this motel. Ever.
The audition itself was quick n' painless. I think I only missed about 5 or 6 questions out of 50. Jim missed more. Joe missed a lot. The worst thing was that the only team that passed the test was named after my doppleganger, Tina Yothers. DAMN YOU, TINA YOTHERS!
I probably said more than I should have, as I signed a confidentiality agreement. Just had to share what I could. On a more pleasant note, I got to see Huey Lewis at Universal Mardi Gras. He's definitely still a DILF! I promise to give a more detailed update of my goings-on real soon!