4 Years Older Than God

Yup. I'm 37. I'm in that blank spot before you hit the "big 4-0". Had an awesome birthday however - I was in Costa Rica as another year passed for me. Of course I'll share the highlights of my week in one of the most wonderful countries in the world (tied with Australia), just not tonight! Stay tuned - same Fitz time, same Fitz channel...

It hasn't really been 20 years, has it?

I was going to do a recap of my goings-on of late (at least I was going to a few weeks ago - gee, how time flies!) But another topic has taken over the blog for now. (And if you really want to know what's been going on, in a nutshell, Mom and Dad moved to the condo - after coming up here to see Dame Edna - where Dad (inevitably) got involved in the show, I won tickets to see Wanda Sykes in Orlando, and, having no one to go with, ventured out by myself and had an excellent time, and - being the good Irish gal I am - had a memorable St. Patty's Day, 'nuff said!)But I digress...

I graduated from high school in 1986. So for you math majors, this means that it's my 20 year reunion this year. It's no secret that my high school years were easily the worst 4 years of my life (overall - I did make, and keep, a few really good friends - good enough that I (Miss "I hate kids")actually attended my first baby shower a few weeks ago!) but, since I think I may actually look better than I did when I was in high school and have an adorable, wonderful, smart-ass husband, I thought it might be actually rather fun to go to my upcoming reunion. This idea was totally vetoed by my (3) high school buddies - who all had no plans of attending - I think they were still probably miffed that I missed our 10-year, but I had just (not even a month earlier) gotten promoted from CNN Tour Guide ("Where do Regis and Kathie Lee sit?" - obviously the bottom of the totem pole) to graphics operator in the main CNN control room (I had the worst schedule ever - 6pm - 3am, Monday and Tuesday off - but I knew I couldn't ask on my first day, "Oh, can I have a weekend off?" - I have tried to explain this a million times, to no avail - but I still love my girls!) Actually, 2 of my friends are preggers, and I can understand why they wouldn't want to go (I know I'd need at least a few drinks before I could see any of those people again!)Besides, I'll be moving closer to my friends by the end of the year (I hope, I hope) - so a reunion really is a moot point. SO (boy, I'm verbose tonight!), I had pretty much dismissed the whole reunion thing (besides, the organizer of the reunion copied me on an email about the soiree and the people she also sent the email to I had no interest in seeing whatsoever - which brought me to the conclusion - why should I spend (at least) $200 to spend the weekend with a bunch of people I never liked (and vice versa, I'm sure?) So, needless to say, my June calendar is open now!

But what I didn't really expect to happen is that I am reconnecting with my grade school friends. My absolute best childhood friend in the world found me on Classmates.com a while back, and I was so excited - we've been emailing, sending old photos back and forth, and actuially got together last year, and it's great. Well, she hooked me up with her high school reunion group, and today I heard from a girl I haven't taked to since 1982! It is so exciting and slightly overwhelming to see these people again after such a long time. As a whole, I am way more connected to the Curley Class of '86 than I ever was to the PJPII Class of '86. I've been trying to mask my excitement from my Mom, who blames herself pretty much every time we talk for moving me away from such a great bunch of kids and subjecting me to Boca Raton for my developmental years, but I'm so over all of that - still not gonna give my alma matter $200 though! It was awesome to relive, for just a moment, events like the one you see in the picture (the girl who I just heard from is the one I'm crushing in this photo!) Made me feel a little old...until I got carded tonight buying a bottle of wine!

We are off to Costa Rica on Saturday. Don't know if I'll have time for more entries before then. I am trying to promise myself that I'll return with a lot of cool travel blog entries. Let's keep our fingers crossed on that one!

My Dog Has More Friends Than Me

I'm back! Thanks to all of you who missed me (that would be you, Rose!)

I wrote a really lengthy entry yesterday, and thanks to the wonders of the Web, it has magically disappeared! I'll recount everything soon, but for now, I'll just get to the meat of the previous, lost post. I have a profile on MySpace - set up to help some of my single male friends tweak their profiles to meet chicks (apparently, I have a gift - it's how I met my husband.) So, anywhoo...I have about 43 "friends" - made up mostly of comedians and bands (as much as I'd like it to be true, Barenaked Ladies are not actually my friends!) I was able to reconnect with a few acquaintances from FSU, but only one real-life new friend (who my husband actually hooked me up with - no, we're not swingers!) I thought it would be cute to set Boo up on a site called Dogster - and wouldn't you know it, the bitch (literally) has more friends than me! Sad, really...

I'll recap the past few weeks in the next post!

Congrats to the Zimmers!

I don't have time for a proper post, but I just wanted to congratulate my sister and her new hubby on their nuptials. They did it smart - they eloped! All the best to you both! And to my (few) faithful readers, I promise many new exciting posts in the near future!

If There's A Dive Bar, Yo I'll Find It...

I don't know what it is about me, but I can find a dive bar in any city I visit! Last night I went over to Orlando, to help sell the Orlando area to one of his reps' wives (they're moving from Minnesota, so it wasn't really a hard sell!) We were actually in Altamonte Springs, spitting distance from the house that my ex-hubby and I shared. Dinner was at Crazy Buffet (yum!) where we enjoyed 2-4-1 wine and loads of sushi. P. and I decided to have a nightcap, so I suggested that we check out the bars at a strip mall (in Florida! Quel surprise!) that was across the road from the restaurant. I had been to the sports bar there a loooooong time ago, and was fascinated with the bar next door to it - Cooter Brown's. Yes, Cooter Brown's. As I have an affinity for bars with "Cooter" in their name (as in the lovely bar we hung out in before my wedding), P. and I headed inside. There was metal on the jukebox (Motley Crue's "Dr. Feelgood") and the drinks were cheap and strong. The clientele, however, led me to believe that this bar could be categorized as a "place where someone's gonna get in a fight". The petite flower sitting on the bar stool next to me was fascinated with my hair color. She complemented me, asked for my hairdresser's name, and promptly fell off her barstool. Oh, and before the tumble, she almost got into a fight with a rather harsh looking middle aged woman with a cowboy hat and bad implants. Let the good times roll...

By the way, I miss Orlando. That's sad. I think what this really says is that I just don't like the Tampa area. I don't get a good "vibe" about the area. Could also be the huge image of my favorite anchor/crush from the tv station I worked for that was plastered on the "Super Duper Doppler" tower! Oh well...

Married? Yeah, married...sheesh!

I don't know why I get a kick out of the title of today's blog entry - I used this "Sixteen Candles" quote when telling a few friends that my youngest sis was getting married sometime soon (the wedding date and location have moved around quite a bit). First it was September in Illinois then March in New Orleans. If she can pin down a date, I'd love to go!

So anyway...I really wanted to write about my big weekend in Hooterville. I really didn't know what to do - we wanted to do something but didn't have the motivation to drive to civilization (Tampa), so we chose to make do with the cavalcade of entertainment that only Port Richey has to offer. Of course, we ended up at the movie theater (much more pleasant since they enforced the curfew!) Saw "Date Movie", which ranks up there with the worst movies I have ever seen (and that's really saying something!) It was just bad. Not "so bad it's good" - a la "Showgirls". Just godwafully bad. Usually chattering and texting teens annoy the hell out of me, but this time they were a welcome diversion from what was going on onscreen. I felt ripped off. So anyway, after such a promising beginning, how to end an evening like this? Why, the "Jale House (yes, that is actually whay the sign says - "Jale". Maybe the guy who owns "The Karl Reef" owns this one too - naah...it's just that no one in Pasco County can spell) Karaoke Cafe"!

We approached the rundown building and saw a sign that said $10 cover. Since we were only staying for one drink, we didn't want to pay the cover. We started to head back to the car and a guy popped his head out the door and yelled to us that there was no cover. So we ventured, hesitantly, inside. There were about 15 people on the cramped dance floor doing "The Electric Slide", so things were not looking good for a lengthy cocktail stop. There was an assortment of motley folks in the club (about 25 in all) - there was the guy who looked like Greg Allman, the lady in the blue velour track suit (very tight and not too kind to her shlubby physique), a guy in a cowboy hat, and the obligatory black guy/fat white chick combo. There was a karaoke "host" floating around, wearing one of those dumb rasta wigs from Spencer's. He didn't sing, he just contributed a few "Awwwwyeah"s over the mic. Actually, for a karaoke bar, there was a strange shortage of karaoke. There were fat binders, full of songs on the tables, and a few people perusing them (Greg Allman for one), but no one took the stage. Until...finally..."Let's bring Rose to the stage." Rose, who was most likely in her mid 50s, proceeded to launch into "Roses Are Red" by Bobby Vinton. She got to about the second line when P. said "That's it" and made a beeline for the door. Guess we'll have to find another place to hang out. At least it was a concrete, tangible example to show P. what was wrong with Port Richey - and insurance that we'll soon be moving to civilization!

Midnight in the Garden of Freeze

Thought that since it's V-day, I'd give a little recap of the past weekend, which was my present from P. - a weekend in Savannah. Savannah is "our place" - when we lived in Atlanta (sniffle!), we used to go there every few weekends, as it's where P. kept his boat. Now it's a really big treat to head up there. P. went up before me, as he had a reservation with Captain Judy to fish and really wanted to go (I had to work.) He called me when he got there and said "It's COLD!" I packed a bunch of sweaters and 3 (count 'em) jackets to make the trek up to our frosty retreat. We stayed at the River Street Inn, right in the center of the action. The hotel was absoultely awesome - historic, balcony overlooking the river, chocolates on the pillow even! I got in late Friday and we wnet to dinner and had a few drinks (Wet Willie's - which I can't believe I patronized so much with the chilly temperatures outside! Kevin Barry's Pub too - where some girl was wearing a backless halter top in 30 degree temperatures. BY THE DOOR!) Didn't really have a plan for Saturday, which was good because we didn't get up until 1pm! Did some shopping (which mostly entailed looking at novelty t-shirts and drooling in the candy stores - but P. did find a stuffed chicken that did the Chicken Dance, which was amusing for about 5 minutes) and had our traditional dinner at the Shrimp Factory (yum!) Then the night got weird...

I was at Wet Willie's alone (Paul had to go up to the room to drop our stuff off) and these 2 large gals bellied up to the bar (they had a lot of belly, so they had no difficulty with that) and one of the babes proceeded to dump the scrawny, redneck (well, we are in Georgia! At least he had all of his teeth. He told me he went to Clemson, but I'm thinking the city, not the university!) dude that was with her off on me - presumably so she could keep his Colts baseball hat. So, even after I told him I was married, he stuck to me and stayed even when P. came into the bar. Then in comes a Bachelorette Party (the girls were making the bride-to-be earn badges for completing her "tasks." I thought the Girl Scout theme was appropriate for Savannah - birthplace of Juliette Gordon Low - their founder. Quite creative.) Poor scrawny dude couldn't get any play from any of the Bachelortettes. Poor guy. Kinda felt sorry for him. Felt sorry for myself the next morning! I won't go into details, but suffice it to say that Wet Willie's frozen concoctions, wine and Chatham Artillery Punches don't mix!

Went to the sloooooooweeeessssttt restuarant Sunday morning (well afternoon, you know how that goes.) We waited "20 minutes" to get a table (I guess "20 minutes" is Savannah Speak for "a real long time".) P. was seated next to a petite flower stretching her sweatpants to their limit, displaying her "summer teeth" and topping it all off with a cap emblazoned with not only a Playboy bunny, but also the annoying phrase "Git R' Done". Yup, Georgia. I think they had 6 out of the 75 tables in the place occupied and the service was awful. I think they had one host (who spent most of his time hiding - he was never at the podium), one waiter, one busboy and one cook (or maybe that was where the host kept sneaking off to...) At least the food was good.

I'm sure I could say more and relate more amusing anecdotes, but I am actually burned out! More on that later...

Cupid, draw back your bow...

Just wanted to enter a quickie today. Everytime I check my email lately, I get a million reminders to get my Valentine a present next week. I don't think my husband wants candy and flowers. I don't know why I keep getting these, but it is amusing watching companies try to market their wares as good Valentine's gifts. Say "I love you" with a new Food Saver. Give your Valentine the gift of meat (yes, even Omaha Steaks is in on the action!) I don't know about you, but a nice card and a small bauble in a light blue box is fine with me (kidding, you don't have to get a card...)

Honestly, do we really need Valentine's Day? When I was single, I hated it (but not as much as New Year's, but that's fodder for another blog entry.) And it's hard to get a guy a gift - I hate when they get me a gift and all I have is a card. Maybe I should give the gift of meat? And the cards! Back in the day, I would get cards for my friends for V-day, but it was gettng increasingly hard to find cards for someone you hadn't seen naked (in a romantic way - I was a fraternity little sis, so I saw a lot!) I almost resorted to getting one of those boxes of Valentine's that we used to send to each other as kids (the ones with pictures of cute, fuzzy animals and really bad puns - or if you had dough, they were emblazoned with the popular cartoon characters of the day.) Now I just reserve cards for hubby and my folks (our family has single-handedely been keeping Hallmark in business for over 25 years!)

But really, if you have a good idea for a guy gift, let me know...

43 Things

As my faithful readers know (all 2 of you), I like to surf the Internet and find things to do to occupy my time. Lately I came across a great site called 43 Things. So, of course, I signed up. Heck, I can accomplish 43 more things before I die, right? I actually have done quite a bit since I set this list up a month or two ago (So do I add new things or just finish the list first? They don't really tell you...)So here's my list (complete with snarky comments):

1. Learn Japanese - pretty self-explanatory. This might be a good time to say that these aren't in any particular order.
2. Meet Peter Frampton - obviously, this would be my number one thing!
3. Learn to play guitar - I am not counting the guitar classes I took in third grade, where I single-handedly took "Hang Down Your Head Tom Dooley", a nice old folk song and reduced it to a funeral dirge, thanks to my awkward chord changes!
4. Move to Australia - easier said than done, right mate?
5. Be a better wife - this one will, I'm afraid, always be on my list!
6. Write a book and have it published - working on that! Started writing class yesterday, and I have promised myself I'd work on my book for a half hour a day. Let's see how long that lasts!
7. Make new friends - trying...
8. Figure out what I want to do with my life - 36 and floating! Maybe if I write that book...
9. Clean out the clutter - this could be taken a few different ways. I'm sure it's the literal way here. I have put a bunch of my books up for sale on Amazon and gotten rid of 3 bags full of clothes - but I'm nowhere near crossing this one off!
10. Go back to Improv comedy - I am trying that too...hard to find the time!
11. Finish my Master's degree - my biggest recent regret. I am going to do this - I was all the way up to my thesis - darn it!
12. Bone upon my Spanish - para mi viaje a Costa Rica en abril. I don't want to have to ask for "cow" at a restaurant because I forgot the word for "beef" again!
13. Go back to Ireland - I'd like to go as an adult - and just live off Guinness and chips for a week!
14. Swim with sharks - I don't even know if they still do this. I knew someone who did this a few years ago and it looked so cool. Of course, I would prefer for this to be a pre-arranged, supervised by professionals kind of experience!
15. Be more diligent about exercising - going to the gym after work is hard, but I have been better at staying away from the TV at night, so this is achievable, I think...
16. Take dance classes - I'd like to find something that is not like classes I've taken in the past - me and a gaggle of pre-teen girls trying to learn a cutesy hip-hop routine (we never even made it through a whole verse of a song!)
17. Join a writing group -actually did this! Now I just have to go to a meeting...
18. Be happy - this is a hard thing to get my arms around - should have put be happy more - no one can be happy all of the time - that's freakish.
19. Cook more - I did do the chili thing on Sunday, so that's a step in the right direction, right? It would help if P. shared my taste for low-fat, mostly vegetarian foods (this will never happen, P. could be the poster boy for Omaha Steaks!)
20. Be more confident
21. Not be stressed - hopefully this will be resolved real soon - like July, perhaps?
22. Be happy with my body - next.
23. Spend more time with my family - this entails more drives to Naples down the nightmare that is I-75. And expensive dog boarding. I still want to see everybody more!
24. Be better with money - I am working on this. I'd be great if I made more though!
25. Stop drinking so much soda - I'll get to this, as soon as I finish this Coke Zero...mmmm....Of course, I can't give up soda completely, as I'd have nothing to mix with my rum! Rummy, rum, rum....
26. Figure out how to play Playstation 2 - I miss Atari. I have tried to play Madden 2005 but get so confused with all of the buttons - I can't spend my down time keyed up about pushing the "X" when I'm supposed to push the triangle and push the left button to move. Frustrating.
27. Learn computer graphics - I used to know some stuff, but you know how technology goes. I think I learned Flash 0.5 or something!
28. Fix my web site - need to do this badly.
29. Learn as much as I can - never getting crossed off either!
30. Learn to sing - not just karaoke.
31. Go to Japan - P.?
32. Get motivated - for what I'm not sure. How about everything!
33. Move - I think this was literal. July...
34. Fix my tattoo - I have to do something with the dumb shamrock on my hip. I got it at a really bad time in my life (long story) and I'm reminded of it everytime I look at it!
35. Win the lottery - who doesn't want this?
36. Keep in touch with friends better - I emailed Eric today...
37. Fish more and better - this one goes with being a better wife!
38. See Hawaii - this should happen within the next few years.
39. Find the perfect hair color - as my self-esteem ebbs and flows, I like my hair and alternately hate it. Blond? Red? Brunette? I have been all of these (currently red) but still haven't found the "mack daddy" color.
40. Consolidate my belongings - did I mention I'm selling some books?
41. Stop procrastinating - I'll do this after I check out eBay...
42. Get my first pedicure - did this on Saturday! Had a fancy-schmancy chocolate manicure. Quite decadent. Cross this baby off!!
43. Be in a movie - SeaQuest doesn't count - I want to be on the big screen!

That's it - seems like I can realistically cross everything off the list. I (as always) will keep you posted...

The Great Tot Conspiracy

They're closing in on me! Just when I start to lose weight (yay on one resoultion at least), my biggest crave in the world is getting closer and closer, surrounding me in a whirlpool of hot oil and potato goodness. Yes, the tater tot.

Let me 'splain. Ever since my Atlanta days, my taste for tots was re-awakened and for a while, I could not get enough of them. We would try to end every drunken night at the Highlander, a bar in Midtown with a very ecclectic crowd - bikers, nouveau-hippies, goths, a few guys who looked like washed-out Glam Rock stars from the 70s and us. The highlight of a visit to the Highlander was ordering a heaping "pitcher o' tots" - literally, a beer pitcher full of the crispy treats. I am a "tot virgin" myself - I don't like 'em scattered, smothered, covered or even dipped in ketchup, just lightly salted, fresh from the fryer. My friends like a little more variety, and one night got more than they bargained for, as some tacks mysteriously appeared in their bowl of chili-covered tots ("tacks n' tots" as my friend Kib dubbed them - he was the one who picked around the tacks to eat all of the tots he could - waste not, want not, right?) On nights I couldn't get to the Highlander, it was Ore-Ida to the rescue! I have a bad habit of cooking under the influence - and not anything that can just be microwaved - oh no, it has to involve the stove or boling water or some other potentially dangerous activity (pasta was one of my favorites - and one night in college a friend of mine and I had a craving for tempura - I had little red oil burn marks all over my arms for the next few days!) So, one night after I got home from some local tavern, I proceeded to bake some tots and watch TV. I fell asleep on the floor, only to awaken, bolt upright and inhale the smoke. The resulting charvoal briquettes killed my tot craving pretty effectively for the night. The whole low carb/South Beach thing kind of changed my relationship with tots, but some new alarming developments have seen the re-awakening of my tot cravings.

Napoleon Dynamite. Yes, damn you Napoleon! His lunchtime tots looked way better than anything I was ever served at school! As tempting as they looked, and thanks to whatever is going on in my body that has reduced my drunken munchies (it's not for lack of drinking, that's for sure!) I am able to resist, with the occasional hiccup or 2 (P. likes the tots too - what kind of wife would I be if I didn't share the tot experience with him?) The other recent development is more disturbing. There have been an alarming number of Sonic fast food restaurants popping up all over my neighborhood. Coincidence...or conspiracy??? Not only is that disturbiong in itself, but Sonic and it's competetors have seemed to have taken over Port Richey - as soon as a new Steak n' Shake, Taco Hell, Wendy's, etc. pops up, a "good" restaurant (where your food isn't served on a plastic tray) disappears! I am well aware that Port Richey is not the first place that comes to anyone's mind when one thinks haute cuisine, but come on! I can't be the only person who wants to live in a world where everytihng isn't fried! I'm scared...hold me...

Image courtesy of baconneggs.gfxartist.com

I have a good excuse...

I have been busy (at work, no less!) this week! I haven't had much time for the usual activities - such as scouring the 'net for more trivial information than anyone would ever need and looking at wacky videos and movie trailers, and I am actually happy about it - it makes the days zip by!

In other news, the pooch finally gets to lose the "satellite dish" tomorrow. Thank God. It makes her head an enormous battering ram that has left the backs of my knees bruised and sore. She has become more of a chicken as she's gotten older - yeah she's only pushing 7 months, but come on - she's supposed to be a watchdog for me when P.'s away, and she's terrified of cardboard boxes, tin foil and thunder (as I found out this AM.) She's a 53 pound chicken!

It's Super Bowl weekend and I have been drafted to make my (almost) world-famous chili (I actually got the recipe off the wall at Chili's years and years ago - my own personal take on it involves every hot thing I can find - habaneros, scotch bonnets, jalepenos, Tabasco...you get the point.) I almost got away without having to prepare it, as P. and one of his buddies were supposed to be fishing in Louisiana until late Sunday, but the weather changed his plans quite drastically. It has been the nastiest winter ever - rain, wind and yuck. I need Spring. I need renewal. I have been getting rid of stuff like crazy (but I did buy a new Pink Lady album - I had to!) Some things I still just can't part with - like my stupid collectible KISS and Austin Powers action figures (got 2 sets of Gene and the gang!) I also can't explain the appeal of my Ginger Spice doll collection (I guess it's because she was so sassy!) The Cher doll - don't need to explain (unfortunately, my 1970's pre-mummification Cher doll is long gone, but I have made do with the milennial version.) I suppose if some of this stuff was worth a few bucks on eBay, I could easily part with them, but last time I checked, you could get all of these for about $10 total. I'll just keep 'em. With my luck I would sell them and the next day there'd be some freak accident where a plane carrying Mike Myers crashes into the KISS tour bus or something! Wow, did I go off on a tangent!

My writing class starts Monday, so maybe I will have some better material on here soon!

Lazy Friday

It's cliche, but thank God it's Friday. What a long week! P. finally comes home today. It's a good thing I have so many pictures of him, or I'd forget what he looks like! Of course, he's fishing this weekend, and I'm continuing the quest to get to the floor in my room (I am getting there...don't know why I can't get rid of my Beanie Babies cllection or Austin Powers Action figures, I am strangely attached to them - and they're not worth squat on eBay - I checked!) I also need to weed through the boxes upon boxes of what I call "memorabilia" and everyone else calls "crap" that needs to go into scrapbooks. I actually finished one (detailing my first Atlanta stint - the Ron-Rocky-CNN era) but that's such a small stretch of my life - I don't know how many books I'll have filled once I fill in all of those gaps! One thing I definitely want to keep is sadly missing, I have lost my Pink Lady album. (Pink Lady is the Japanese disco duo who had an infamously short-lived TV show - produced by Sid & Marty Krofft and co-starring Jeff "Buttsteak" Altman, who has never been funny. Never.) I am very sad. I have also figured out that I really don't have much to say today - the ennui is killing me! I'll write more later, but in the mean time, if you find my Pink Lady album, please let me know.



And you wondered why I was such a Spice Girls fanatic...

Dammit, we can't have nice things...

Greetings on post-Hump Day! First off, we got the vacation situation all worked out. I will be permitted to take a week off (without pay, of course) to go to Costa Rica, as long as I don't take one more second off until my year anniversary in June. This also means that I have to drive to Savannah by myself on Friday and miss out (again) on fishing with the legendary Captain Judy. Oh well, at least I won't be subjected to the country stations P. has programmed into his Sirius unit! At least I have my XM, Dane Cook and Jim Gaffigan to keep me company!

Now, to the matter at hand. The destructo-dog! Ever since Boo has come into our lives, we have managed to keep the things we would like to be free of bite marks and slobber (shoes, books, etc.) out of harm's way. We also have a wide array of things she can chew on in lieu of my Steve Madden pumps or P.'s surge protector. Unfortunately, since she is still limited by the big satellite dish around her head, she has been denied her chewies because she tends to thrash around quite a bit, and her stitches have started pulling a bit. I don't want a return engagement at the vet, so no playtime for the pooch until she's healed. SO...this AM, she found something new. In the 5 minutes I stepped into the bathroom to put on my makeup (yes fellas, it actually only takes me 5 minutes to put on my face. The hair, however, is another story - and don't even get me started on finding something to wear!) she managed to chew up a substantial portion of the carpet in front of the laundry room - even exposing the "painstick" thast holds the carpet down (if you have ever stepped on it, you know exactly what I'm talking about.) This wouldn't be so bad if we hadn't just had some other mishaps in the house, calling for insurance claims and repairmen trotting through the house (it's feeling more and more like that horrible movie "The Money Pit" every day.) At least we can tack this on to the list. By the time we get done fixing everything, P. isn't going to want to leave! Great. I was beyond pissed this morning - and even her big, sad brown eyes didn't keep Boo out of her cage. (That's hard...could you resist this?

I thought not...

Clipped Wings?

I read online that today is the "gloomiest day of the year" and for me, it's kind of ranking up there with some of my not so pleasant days. Yes, there are the usual Monday problems, but my travel plans may be seriously curtailed for the next few months. I have only been at my job for a year, but I have already taken 15 days off. 15! Wow, it didn't seem like that many. Friday here, Monday here for long weekends with P. It wasn't an issue until a long Valentine's Day weekend in Savannah came up. That request led into a week in Costa Rica that may not happen now. Oh sure, I could go, but I'd be going as an unemployed tourist. I don't know what to do. We (P. and myself) had talked this past weekend about our future. He has been travelling a lot, and we haven't had a lot of "quality time". By July we will know if we're staying here (albeit not in Hooterville!) or heading east to be closer to P.'s office. I need a change, that's all I know. I am sad, miserable and lonely. I am trying to expand my horizons (I have been really good about easing up on my television consumption, well...except for "Flavor of Love"- yeaaaaahh boooooooyyy!) but I just feel like we're almost roommates - not even, as I saw my roomies more than I see my husband. It sucks. I sent P. a frantic email this AM when I got the news - I'm sure he's probably pissed and/or confused at the moment. Ought to be an interesting conversation tonight!

By the way, my youngest sis got engaged this past weekend! Despite my "doom and gloom" attitude, I am really happy for her and my future brother-in-law!

Darling I love you but give me Park Avenue...

Since when has my life become like "Green Acres"? I guess I should have known that marrying P. would bring a heaping helping of challenges into my life (not driving him crazy, being a good wife, cleaning a house, etc.) but one thing I didn't really expect were some of our differences that I either denied or overlooked. We do have a frightening amount of things in common (both communications majors in college, both love football and hair metal, both are sushi fanatics, the list goes on and on...) but one thing I don't get is the whole urban (me)/rural (him) thing. Now, I think it's pretty obvious that I am not thrilled with our living situation at present, but P. is happy as a clam to be living in the sub-suburbs. Yes, the lake is lovely, but I am getting way too excited about doing things like going to the "fancy mall" and getting my hair done - as these tend to have been my major outings as of late. It's downright depressing where I live. I know Florida is strip mall city, but the ones around us are run down and many are still bearing the scars from last year's hurricane (a lot of blown-out signs litter highway 19.) Restaurants are closing at an alarming rate (we have a few chains in the area, but many of the indie places are gone or rarely patronized. There's really nothing to do once the 5 o'clock whistle blows - although I am starting to figure out why there are so many A.A. meetings in P.R. I don't think we will ever move. I am trying to get used to the slower pace of life, but it's really hard! I probably should stop writing now, as I can get real negative real fast, and I want this blog to overflow with positivity and humor - not complaining and anger. Besides, I'm babbling. I'll write more later...

Broken Resoultions

Yes, I managed to already break a resolution. I haven't been writing, and I should be ashamed of myself (I am). I have stayed slim (I managed to fit back into my "Prince Pants" - my favorite pair of pants ever. They are black and lace up in the front and on the flared bottoms. They were my favorite club pants - I looked "hot" in them (well, with me, I don't get much hotter than "lukewarm", but you catch my drift. Of course, I don't think the "Prince Pants" are going to see much action in Port Richey - they're not going to fit in at the "Karl Reef", that's for sure!) I have been keeping the house (relatively) clean - I finally tackled the mysterious pink mildew in our bathroom, so I've been doing the good wife thing (haven't seen much of P. since New Year's, so a clean house probably isn't the best possible indicator of what a good wife is.) I have been away from the TV a lot more, mainly because I impulsively decided to clean out the closet in "my room" (aka the guest room - our guests can stay with us as long as they don't need to hang anything up!) I have old photo albums, scrapbooks and things that need to be put in scrapbooks strewn all over the floor, along with every single thing I ever wrote, from my My Melody diary I had when I was 10 to the last incarnation of my now-abandoned thesis. (Sniff - don't get me started on that.) It's hard to get rid of things, except for my "fat clothes", I was glad to get rid of those! School stuff is the hardest. I have textbooks from my Radio/TV days that I think don't even talk about cable, and have lessons for editing 3/4" video tape (I'm sure even the podunk station I worked at in Panama City doesn't even use that anymore) and I'm positive I won't need any papers discussing the films of Francois Truffaut for anything...ever. But it's stuff I wrote, so I'm keeping it (P., who also was a Comm major, has some outdated books too, so I'm sure we'll both come to our senses someday and pitch them. (Note, I said "someday"...)

What was I getting at? Oh yes, resolutions. #2 has still been a tricky one. I am still very much in limbo with that. I have my days though, so it's at least a step in the right direction. So, 3 out of 5 ain't bad, right? I did sign up for an online writing class through the university, so I'm trying. And I will start writing a lot of random stuff here, just to keep the right side active. I am also keeping up muy other blog, runninfitz - if you read it, you'll find out why. Oh well, the painkillers are kicking in (getting over my current medical problems would greatly contribute to improving my chances of achieving the happiness I'm searching for!) so until later...

Life as a "Doggie Mama"

Aaah, the joys of dog ownership. There is not one sqare inch of our house, cars, and clothes not covered in white fur. Each and every pillow on the sofa is riddled with little bite marks. I have trudged through my neighbors' yards every morning, yelling "Boo, poopies!" I am losing my mind.

But that's not really what I wanted to talk about. I was going to go off on Lindsay Lohan for making us recovering bulimics look bad, but it's not worth my time and effort. I don't want to fall into celebrity journalism here. I'll just keep my fond memories of working at Planet Hollywood.com, where I was paid to care about what Ben Affleck was doing. I was going to talk about quitting and procrastination, but I'll do that later. I was going to take you on a tour of my horrendous movie collection, but I think that deserves more time than I have right now (you really need an hour or so to properly discuss "Roller Boogie".) So that really leaves me with nothing for today, but at least I'm writing! Oh, and I get a chance to for,mally warn you about the Chris Atkins vampire flick I talked about yesterday. It's called "Dracula Rising" and you should do whatever you have to do to avoid this tripe! (Sorry, Chris, I still think you're a hottie. I had to endure the abuse in college when my friends found the 45 (that's a record, kids!) of your song from "The Pirate Movie", so I guess now we're even!)

"I opened up a container of yogurt, and under the lid it said "Please Try Again" because they were having a contest I was unaware of. But I thought I might have opened the yogurt wrong, or maybe Yoplait was trying to inspire me. 'C'mon, Mitchell, don't give up. Please try again. A message of inspiration from your friends at Yoplait. Fruit on the bottom, hope on top.'"

Still miss ya, Mitch!

The snow turned into rain...

Yeah, yeah, yeah....everyone does it, and they all pretty much look the same, but I can't help but add my resoultions to the 2006 pile. So, here goes:

1. Lose weight. How trite. Do you think anyone resolves to gain weight? At least I don't have as far to go as I did a few months ago, when I was a bit more "fat and happy" (see #2). And, best part, I found my old, "skinny" jeans - and they FIT! Saves me a chunk of change, as I was going to replace my (now) baggy jeans that looked like they had a garage sale after the bus and truck production of "Annie" (a.k.a. the "Ragamuffin Collection"!)

2. Get happy (or at least happier). This one is way harder than losing weight. I have a great hubby who's patient, cool, fun, patient, tolerant, nurturing, supportive, did I say patient yet? - and I should be ecstatic that I was able to pull the wool...um, I mean find someone like him (I'm such a kidder!) BUT (not as in big but...that's back to #1) I am so dissatisfied with ME. I am stagnating at my job (definitely not what I signed on for...I wanted to be Peter Scolari on "Bosom Buddies" (Henry/Hildegarde - advertising copywriter extrordinaire), but am more like the late, great Wendie Jo Sperber (Amy - office flunky, coffee bitch. If you don't understand these references, too bad - you should've watched the show!) If you want to take a bright side approach, at least I have time to write (see #3) and conduct very important Internet research (such as finding the "More Cowbell" sketch from SNL and searching for a DVD of "Valley of the Dolls" to add to my horrendous movie collection.) Unfortunately, I still don't really, truly know what I want to be when I grow up (and at 36 years old that's probably not a good thing.) The deadline to complete my graduate thesis has come and gone, and nothing bugs me more than being a quitter, so that's also weighing on my mind (even though I really don't have a good use for a Master's degree in Mass Communication...) Let's see, what else? I am a horrible parent to my pooch (who I'm sure regards me as "Ol' Candy Ass".) To quote Eddie Murphy, "My chi'dren don't lissen to me." She has a blatant disregard for my calls outside, and is much more content eating duck poop than coming tome when I call her. P's the disciplinarian here, as it probably should be with "kids", but children don't chew on your shoes and computer cables when left alone for a few minutes (or so I've heard.) And of course, the cherry on top of my angst sundae is my living situation. I have still to make a real friend - and it's really hard when you're a good 25 miles away from any activity. The house is taking it out on me - I came home after Christmas to find "my room" flooded out and many of my pictures destroyed - not to mention the fact that all of the furniture and objets d'crap that occupied my room now takes up space in our living room, den, and "my" bathroom! I hate being in limbo - as soon as P's comany gets straightened around and established a permanent home base, my hands are basically tied. Add to that the fact that I'm alone a lot, as P.'s been travelling quite a bit as of late (left in "Chaos Central" with an adolescent German Shepherd with an attitude!) 2006 is going to be a moving year for me...in more ways than one! Whew! That probably should've been a few resolutions! Onward...

3. WRITE - in any way, shape or form! I think I have my novel/novella starting in my cluttered mind (title is there, as well as general direction - but I'm not quite ready to get an agent yet!) I have to make time to do this - and in a perfect world, not during the workday! I also want to be more dilligent with this blog (after next week Runninfitz.blogspot.com may be concluding, so I will devote to this one full-time) as it may lead me to some great story ideas (and it's quite cathartic at times...) So, in order to write, looks like I should...

4. Watch less TV - sit on my lazy butt less. When you get psyched because "Celebrity Fit Club 3" is on, followed by an "I Love the (year, band, song)" marathon, it's probably time to step away from the boob tube. "Trading Spouses" is not supposed to be the most mentally stimulating part of my day (but I feel more like a "God Warrior" for watching it!) Yes, "House", you will not be snubbed (I can't, I am developing a girlish crush on Hugh Laurie) and "The Office" and "My Name is Earl" will make up the rest of my "must see" list. Other than that - life's to short to watch crappy on-demand movies (and boy, 2005 was ripe with them: "Blue Demon", "Dark Town", "Dracula 3000" and that God-awful Chris Atkins vampire flick just to name a few) so free time should involve activities such as writing, exercising, walking the pooch and other such things.

5. Be a better friend and wife. I actually started on the first item last month, as I managed to send out Christmas cards (but it's the first Christmas after the wedding. I think people are more apt to send cards that first year. I need to pick up the phone and call folks more often (one activity I could actually add to #4.) Being a better wife is going to take more work. I need to go fishing more and, well, see #4 again! If I get #2 going, this will also help out immensely!

Five is enough, right? Oh, there's still other things like boning up on my Spanish, taking a guitar lesson, getting de-cluttered, cooking dinner more often, making it through a whole day at EPCOT Wine Fest and such. I am optimistic that 2006 will be a good one!

Later, 'Taters!

I don't have anything to say, yet I'm here and typing...

I really want to write. I can't find anywhere here where I can take a class or two (I don't think there's a lot of "readers" in Pasco county - apologies to Bill Hicks!) I am languishing in limbo here. I have lots of good ideas, but can't seem to get them out of my noggin. And I am SO TIRED! I still don't know why that is. I had a barrage of tests, and they can't find anything wrong with me. I think it's "unfulfilled potential-itis" or something...

Hubby left today for the rest of the week/weekend. A weekend alone in Port Richey. Woo-hoo. At least I can clean the house or something - in wild anticipation of our eventual move. I don't know why I still get the wanderlust so badly - although I do not belong in PR - at all! I think I just didn't want to leave Atlanta this time around (because I was happy.) Don't get me wrong - I love hubby and pooch. I just need friends and an outlet for the spare hours I have when I'm not working or driving to and from work (12 hours of my day!) I'm frustrated...

In lieu of an update...

I am posting my answers from one of those dumb, waste your time at work surveys...get to know me!

1. How tall are you?
5'4" and shrinking

2. Do you own a gun?
Nope

3. Rehab? Counseling?
The latter. Often.

4. Have you ever killed an animal?
Do bugs count? Do fish count? (caught and not released!)

5. Are you Irish?
Yup (mostly)

6. What do you think of hot dogs?
I don't. Haven't eaten one (non-vegetarian) since I was 12.

7. What's your favorite Christmas song?
Merry Christmas Darling by the Carpenters (yes, I know...cheese-o-rama! But it makes me tear up every time I hear it.) Oh yeah, Slick Nick by Fishbone is my non-sentimental favorite.

8. What is your favorite smell?
Fresh baked bread

9. What do you prefer to drink in the morning?
Some diet soda product

10. Do you do pushups?
Can't do them well, so, no

11. Have you ever done ecstasy?
Did herbal ecstasy once, had me climbing the walls

12. Have you been shot?
Only by Cupid's arrow...awwww....

13. Have you ever been hospitalized?
Yes.

14. Do you like painkillers?
Once a month!

15. What is your secret weapon to lure in the opposite sex?
Love of football

16. Do you own a knife?
A lovely set of kitchen and steak knives...

17. Do you have A.D.D.?
In a manner of speaking...

18. Do you love the pain a tattoo brings?
Aaawwww yeah!

19.Name Five Drinks You Regularly Drink:
Rum, vodka, diet Coke, beer, energy drinks

20. What's In Your CD Player?
New Nickelback

21. What's Under Your Bed?
Leaf for dining room table and old cassettes I can't part with

22. Current Hair?
A melange of color, long

23. What are you wearing?
Aqua sweater, navy pants

24. Current Worry?
Don't have nearly enough space (or time) to type here!

26. Current Hate?
Gas prices

27. Favorite Place To Be?
Cairns, Australia

28. Least Favorite Place To Be:
I guess work...

29. Do You Play an Instrument?
Mad Kazoo skills

30. Favorite Colors:
Black and green

31. Person(s) From Your Past You Wish You Could be with Right now?
The old Miami Shores crew

32. Where Would You Like To Go:
See number 27

33. Where do you want to live?
Again, see number 27

34. Favorite foods?
Sushi, hands down.

35. Color of most clothes u own?
Black

36. Number of pillows you sleep with?
2

37. What do you wear when you go to sleep?
An unflattering t-shirt/boxer combo

38. What were you doing 12AM last night:
ZZZZZZZZZ

39. What do you think you'll be doing in 10 years?
If there's a God, going on a book tour!

40. Are you paranoid?
Nah...

41. First piercing/tattoo?
Ears (first holes) at 15 at the Town Center mall

42. Last person you yelled at?
I guess hubby (I'm not much of a yeller)

43. Latest addiction?
Fark.com

44. Last thing you ate?
Gardenburger "chicken" meal

45. If you could be a pirate, would you?
Nope, I'd prefer to be a wench!

46. Do you have an iPod?
Love it.

47. When did you last vomit?
Wow, that's been a while...can't honestly remember!

48. What's in your pockets right now?
Not a damn thing

49. What color are your bedroom walls?
Lime-ish green (haven't bothered to paint)

50. Last thing that made you laugh?
"The boys'" football emails

51. Any pets now?
One fish, one mouse and one dog

52. Innie or an outtie?
innie

53. Do you have any piercings?
3 per ear, 1 per navel

54. If you were a crayon what color would you be?
Periwinkle

55. Have you ever won any awards?
Only academic (high school). Oh yeah, and one time I won a $25 gift certificate for singing karakoke at the Witches' Brew.

56. How many TV's do you have in your house:
Three (livin' large!)

57. Have you ever sprained/broken/fractured a bone or gotten stitches/staples?
Broke ribs, wrist. Sprained ankle, other wrist

58. Who do you tell your dreams to?
Nobody